Nothing is impossible…

By Princess B. Abuluyan

It doesn’t matter who the child’s parents are. Does it? And perhaps it really is no excuse either. When it comes to the kind of person a child grows up to be, whether a good person or a bad person, that child is responsible for his/her actions.

People who are parents—one of their most important jobs is guiding their child. Parents have the responsibility of teaching their child what is right as well as what is wrong.

However, making the ultimate decision to act right, well, that decision is all up to the child.

This is not to say that parents don’t influence their child’s decisions. “There are only two kinds of people in this world…good people and bad people,” is what my mom once said to me. And perhaps there really is no being in between the two kinds. My mom asked me, “Which kind of person do you want to be?” Without a doubt, “GOOD” is, and will always be, my number one answer.

Does it matter what a child’s parents do? Well, in some cases, a child’s parents may not be that child’s best role models. They may be alcoholics, or drug addicts, or young parents who don’t know the first things about raising a child. They may be parents who don’t act like parents. Like a single mother who acts like she’s her daughter’s older sister rather than her mother. Don’t be surprised if mother shops at “Forever 21” or wears her teenage daughter’s clothes. Hey, it happens.

In reality, no child asks to be born into the kind of family he/she is born into. And in some cases, no child asks to be put in the kinds of situations he/she has to face.

Like a child in the middle of parents who are constantly arguing. And then, a divorce. Imagine the toll it takes on the child who has to go through this—it’s unfortunate let alone heartbreaking. And what becomes of the child as a person? In all honesty, some children who come from a “broken” family turn bad. Perhaps they misbehave, act poorly in school or often get into fights with other students. Guidance is what they need, and emotional support too. It’s okay for a child to be upset or angry about their parents’ divorce. For crying out loud, how else could a child feel about that? However, a child makes the ultimate decision whether to act positively or negatively towards any given situation. Misbehaving is a negative response, and does no good for the child. Life will only become tougher.

Every person in this world has their own problems and struggles that they’re going through. It is how people choose to deal with their problems and struggles that can either make or break their lives.

It boggles my mind when young teenagers make poor decisions or do bad things in their lives. They steal from stores, or vandalize people’s property, or misbehave in school. Young girls think they’re in love, and oops, they get pregnant. The question is: “Is it their fault?” Where oh where is their common sense? Troubled is what these children are. But will that always be a valid reason, or is it an excuse?

• “Oh yeah, my parents divorced when I was young, and that really messed me up.”
• “Forget college! My parents don’t seem to care about my education anyway. They didn’t even go to college, so why do I have to?”
• “My mom had me when she was 18-years-old. So why does it matter that I’m 17 and pregnant? I can handle it!”

Grow up! If a child truly wants to be a good person, that child will strive to be a good person, despite problems and struggles.

One of my cousins—her mother gave birth to her at age 17. After my cousin, she gave birth to a boy, and after him, another girl. The father is out of the picture. And that’s a lot of struggle and hardship involved, being so young, already a mother, and having to raise three kids on her own. And my cousin was exposed to all the struggle and hardship. One may have thought that she’d grow to be a strong person and goal oriented. She even told me herself that she’d focus on school and would not turn out like her mother. So I was completely shocked when the news leaked out that she was pregnant. My cousin was only 18-years-old, and she had gotten pregnant. That changes her life forever. But it doesn’t necessarily have to be a negative change, depending on how she deals with it.

Every single person in this world has their own problems and struggles that they’re going through. It is how people choose to deal with their problems and struggles that can either make or break their lives.

Sometimes, it’s a matter of children understanding what they have as they’re growing up. A child doesn’t have to grow up to be exactly like his/her parents. Instead, a child could see the struggles their parents go through and want better than that. There is always that option, that decision to act right, for a child to become a better person and have a better life. It just takes a lot of hard work to get there. And despite the life struggles, who a child’s parents are or where a child comes from or what a child has been through, nothing is impossible when it comes to having a good life.